Saturday, December 16, 2006

Thank Goodness I Am Protestant

Jasper Speaks:

Catholic weddings are FOREVER long. We went to one for one of Kendra's work buddies tonight. Over thanksgiving my best friend at work got married and the whole ceremony was literally fourteen minutes. Tonight, one hour and forty minutes. And I will never get how you can drink out of the same cup as 100 other people. The pews were about a foot wide and I sat in constant fear of falling off. The Priest seemed to want to be a Polish stand up comedian. Odd. We also gave other guests creative names like, "Bad Hair Chick (no really it was red, yellow AND orange and HUGE), "Bad Dress Chick" (who not surprisingly seemed to be good friends with Bad Hair Chick. Perhaps they are a super crime fighting duo) and "What Were You Thinking When You Thought That Dress Still Fit Chick". People watching can be the highlight of an event like that.
The bride was beautiful, the food was alright and I just sat back a lot and GAWKED at how ABSOLUTELY GORGEOUS my wife was tonight. YOWZA! She sizzles! Man she looked great. Too bad she got the raw end of this marriage deal.

Church Christmas musical is tomorrow. I pray it goes well. Jeff Wells and I are wearing red snowmen ties because we are essentially twins separated before birth.

Can't you see the resemblance? Obviously this is like three years old and I am glad I don't exactly look this large anymore!
Speaking of looking smaller, my pal Matt McNutt, who was on the Biggest Loser this season did awesome. He was the runner up for the most percentage of weight lost from the people who did not stay on the ranch. He lost the most weight at 176 pounds. Here is the before and after shot:

Inspiring to say the least. Wow! I really need to start working out again!

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