Saturday, May 17, 2008

Jasper Speaks:

Calibrate is behind us. I think the turnout was low. I really liked Chris Flomsbee. I liked what he said on Friday night better than today. Last night it was just for Youth Pastors and this is some of what he said and some of my speaks about it:

1. The Call in your life:
“Your call, your station in life is where your deep gladness and the worlds deep hunger meet.”
-by Fredrick Beekner

Just a thought on what are you doing that matters to you the most. Have you satisfied that deep hunger in the role you currently have or do you need to start searching for that deep hunger in your life?

I think that I absolutely LOVE that quote. It really spoke to my soul. Since he really spoke on what matters most after this, I decided I would not stay for Kevin Ragsdale and would drive home to have dinner with my wife and son.

2. Lives are being changed:
Often we are leading students who don’t really share with us what life change is happening and no matter how little seems to be happening we need to know that the word of God changes lives. If we are caring for students and sharing the word with them then lives are changing.

I have had some struggles lately beliving that a difference is being made. It was a nice reminder that it isn't about me.

3. Broken Relationships:
Are there people that you need to have a come to Jesus meeting with. All of us have conflict in our ministries if we are doing anything worthwhile. We could all probably do something that would allow us to be more compassionate towards those who struggle with what we are doing in ministry.

Made me think of a youth leader I had in Maine and how thankful I am that we settled the stupid score a long time ago and are now friends and partners in ministry,

4. Contentment:
Why is it that we continue to search for something more all the time? We need to find ourselves being more content with where God has placed us. Let’s start finding time to just rest in God and stop looking for the next best thing. Just be content with what God has given you.

I am hoping that I will rest in contentment when I get back to just being a YP (under 400 hours to go). I have learned a lot about being content over the past four years. Resting in God is a good goal.

Today was less awkward for me than yesterday. I really like having my team there. Although, I don't know that I got a ton out of the two days. It was a nice start to what could be a really great regional conference.

Friday, May 16, 2008

Jasper Speaks:

I had a great day yesterday! After school the other teachers took me (and the other two teachers who are leaving from our department) out to Chili's. We talked and yuked it up a lot. It was fun. It makes me think that I will miss them. We really had such a good time!

Then for dinner last night we went out for Chinese food with my cousin Cathy. Then she came back to our house. We had a great time with her too. She is so much fun. Jackson was feeling way better and really took to her. He was completely off the scale cute and happy last night. Oh I love being his Daddy!

Kendra is on the mend as well. It will be nice when we are all healthy again. I am going to have a really long weekend with a Youth Leader's training today and tomorrow. I hope it will go well. I am still pretty tired.

Just a few days left! It is getting exciting as I clean my room and get it ready to go! It makes me happy!

Thursday, May 15, 2008

Jasper Speaks:

The crazy parent has apparently won in the battle of the late work. There public education continues to shine in raising a generation of lazy, mediocre drains on society. There is no personal responsibility. If you whine long enough you can get out of anything. Not really angry. Not really surprised. Just a bit scared of what the future of our country will hold when this is the way we are raising our children.

Reality Check pretty much sucked last night. So today I am 0-2 in both my careers. I still love teenagers. They are still my passion. Just today I really think I suck at what I do. At least I have the promise of being done with the education frustration in just a few days. I know some people are not pleased that I have been honest about my feelings on here but really, I just want to move on. I am so tired every day. I want to be able to do more than just go through the motions in my life. I am completely worn out. It is all I can do to get out of bed in the mornings because I am so wiped out. Maybe people don't understand that. I am sorry. I vent here.

I really didn't set out to make this a depressing post but I guess I did. Man, I want a nap. I hope your day is going better than mine. I know it will all be better soon. It will start in just about 19 days!

Wednesday, May 14, 2008

Jasper Speaks:

Another day at school is nearly over. Another week half over. Everyday we go on is closer to the end. I am ready. The students want to be done too. It has been a long year! A good year but a long one nonetheless.

I find myself getting apprehensive when it comes to going back to full-time ministry. Will I remember how to do it? Will it be as rewarding as I remember it? Will I still be able to utilize the gifts with student ministry God has let me exercise in the past? What if I suck? Ug!

Last night we had several of Kendra's friends that she worked at One Way with over for dinner. It was nice. They didn't leave until 11:00PM. I was so wasted this morning when the alarm went off at 4:45. I also kept waking up with leg cramps all night. No fun. I hate when I am this tired on Wednesdays (which is one of my 15 hour days). Oh well, I guess I have to push through.

Students are just testing today. BOR-ING. I am all caught up with grades and am just trying to stay awake. This weekend I will be gone all the time at a youth leader's training that I have very little excitement about. Doesn't that sound like fun?

Is it bad that I am thinking about not going to my high school reunion. Everything I wanted to know about people, I found out on the internet. Stupid internet. Darn you Al Gore!

Tuesday, May 13, 2008

Jasper Speaks:

Last night I went to a high school baccalaureate. It was a little over an hour and a half but it seemed longer. But the saddest part for me was that there was no God mentioned at all. I remember when these things were a time to bless the seniors as they began their time as adults. I realize we live in a different time where God is no longer okay. Still, I know many school districts allow baccalaureates to be given off campus so that they may still have a true blessing over the seniors.

The dictionary definition of a baccalaureate is
a religious service held at an educational institution, usually on the Sunday before commencement day. Instead this particular high school offers nothing more than warm fuzzies and candle lighting. The service was nice but why call it a baccalaureate? Why not call it a "graduation celebration"? That is what it was. It was a pleasant time to remember and consider what life is all about.

It was not for the school where I teach and it makes me appreciate here more. I was just there as a youth pastor supporting my kids. The principal there used a lot of "respected" famous people. Using quotes from humanists as her "sermon". I am sure she is a great person but she exuded that educational elitism that is what I really don't like about education. I have been blessed to have principals that do not display this. As much as I complain, I really do like the principal here. He is a strong administrator that commands respect but is gentle and humble as well. I am blessed.

Please pray for me today as I talk with an Assistant Principal about the parental problem I have had. The parent will come and talk to him tomorrow. I am a little nervous. I hate drama and I am in the middle. PRay that not only will I stand my ground but that the AP will be supportive.

Monday, May 12, 2008

Jasper Speaks:

I am seriously living in the house of horrors. Kendra and Jackson are both sick. Kendra had a fever of 101 last night and had slept all through the day. I mean that pretty much literally. Jackson is still snotty and gross and grumpy. Then he puked. A lot. On the floor and then on Kendra. Did I mention Kendra was already sick? I am at school and just got a voice mail from Kendra saying the daycare won't take Jackson because of the rash on his face. This rash is there because of the crusty snot that lays over his face at night. Disgusting yes. Dangerous to others no. So, I am stressed. I missed last Monday from church and really need to be there today but Kendra needs to be at work as well. UG! ---Update--- Yup! The Doctor's office confirmed. It is just an irritation. Stupid daycare! UG!

As the house was sick yesterday, we all slept almost all day. I was just depressed and didn't really care so I just found sleeping a better way to deal with my mom being dead for Mother's Day. It just sucks. Then all the sick stress just makes it worse.

The wedding went well. Not as scary as I thought it might be. Still, with the fam sick, we didn't stay for the reception and drove back late Saturday night. It made for a long weekend. This was our second quick trip to Kendra's mom in a month. It was a funeral last time and a wedding this time. UG!

We are down to the last three weeks of school. Bring it on. I am so tired of burning the candle at so many ends. I am just tired, depressed and stressed. The end.